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A driver and his wife were having marital problems over his being gone so much. Much of the trouble was her having to rear their three children with him on the road. Their seven-year-old daughter displayed her anger by marking on the walls with crayon. The two boys, 3 and 5, missed their father and his daily guidance that is so precious at that age.

The wife would be ready to scream when he called in after having to go through days of dealing with the children expressing their insecurity-and often she did-thus causing him to not call.

This problem is not unfamiliar with a lot of drivers wanting to have families and remain in the industry at the same time. It is all too frequently played out normally with the husband on the road and the wife at home. Left without help, this scenario is a divorce asking for a lawyer. This kind of worry can put a huge amount of stress on a driver-and become a safety issue in the process. It becomes hard to focus on the job at hand when family troubles like this are on your mind all the time.

I found when I was on the road, I experienced identical challenges with my family. Some tips that I learned might be helpful to you:

• Get a cell phone and call in daily. You do not have to sign up for an extended period of time now as prepaid cell phones are available for a very reasonable expense.
• Spend time at the start of each call to tell your wife how much you love her and miss her. It might get expensive but it will be the best money you ever spend!
• Have your wife share something new about each child. As you talk to each one, mention those changes-like losing a tooth or making a new friend.
• Address any disciplines they might need. There's nothing like daddy's strong supportive voice. Always support your wife and her decisions with the children. She's there and you are not.
• Have your wife show the children where you are each night before they go to bed by using a road atlas or a globe. Start by showing them where they are and then where you are-they will not understand the distance, but they will think they know where you are if they need you.

That's the way I see it - Bob Hataway - TransAlive.

Bob Hataway is president of TransAlive USA, an organization of 100,000 volunteers across America dedicated to serving drivers and their families in the transportation industry through their Caring in Action=Safety Program. They cover every zip code in the United States and move quickly to meet the needs of the drivers and their families when they experience an accident, illness, heart attack or even death on the highway. Call 800-USA-HURT for assistance.