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Rage, stomping, snorting, throwing things around, and bellowing are all the signs of the proverbial bull in a china shop-and at times, signs of the angry truck driver. We have all seen them. They are the ones that think they shouldn't wait their turn at the fuel desk, wait for their turn in a staging area, or wait for you to get out of their way on the road. They are the drivers who run one foot behind a truck or four wheeler that has somehow angered them, flashing their lights and blowing their horns. These angry people make our days a little tougher to deal with even if they are not truly angry with us.

Recently, I was at a truck stop where there was only one cashier behind the fuel desk. There was a man there who got very angry because he had to wait while the cashier assisted the other people in line. The man was swearing and actually stomped his foot. When he finally got to the counter, he cussed the young cashier, snatched his receipt out of the cashier's hand, then threw the pen at him and stormed out of the door. I wasn't impressed, would you have been?

We work in a high-stress job and deal with uncertain situations hitting us every second. We also have to deal with the public at least in the places we load, deliver and fuel. Both tend to add up and then finally, perhaps because of a minor situation like the above, something will set us off into rage. One might not stomp one's foot in public when angry but the anger needs to go somewhere, and this can translate into other acts such as fighting with one's spouse or children, one's dispatcher or mechanic, or be vented on the road toward a totally innocent four wheeler driver or another truck driver.

Some people express anger in other ways. Perhaps they are just grumpy or irritable all of the time. Maybe they sulk, get physically ill, or withdraw into themselves. Frustration with life in general or something in one's life specifically, can lead to someone holding anger in and not expressing it openly. Society does not condone showing anger openly whereas other, equally frequent and valid emotions are OK.

Is getting angry positive or negative? I used to bottle up my emotions-anger especially. Then some minor thing would happen and I would blow up. It took me a long time to realize that this type of behavior was counterproductive and not positive. People tend to shut down and withdraw from angry people and if one is trying to make a point angrily, then most times the listener doesn't hear clearly what the problem is or gets defensive and maybe afraid. Nothing is accomplished.

It took me another long time to learn strategies for dealing with anger productively and to remain calm at least most of the time. Here is what I do that might work for you: If I get angry, I stop and think about what I am angry about, taking a few minutes to breathe deeply. Am I justified in being angry or am I overreacting because I am tired, stressed, ill or overburdened for the day? If I am justified, by the time I have figured that out, I have calmed down to the point that I can discuss with the person, if it was a person who angered me, what they did or didn't do. If it is a situation, like getting the one-fingered salute we are all so familiar with, then the few minutes of time will likely allow the finger waver to move away. If I am not justified in being angry, then I have calmed down enough to just shrug it off.

The American Psychological Association recommends that when you feel angry, you

• Breathe deeply, from your diaphragm; breathing from your chest won't relax you. Picture your breath coming up from your "gut."
• Slowly repeat a calm word or phrase such as "relax," "take it easy." Repeat it to yourself while breathing deeply.
• Use imagery; visualize a relaxing experience, from either your memory or your imagination.
• Non-strenuous, slow yoga-like exercises can relax your muscles and make you feel much calmer.

It is perfectly normal to feel anger, it is how we deal with it that counts. One must deal with anger constructively, not destructively. As adults, we should not throw temper tantrums, be hostile, or criticize everyone and everything. We don't need to scare the people we work with or live with because we cannot control our tempers. And we should never act out violently in anger unless perhaps we are protecting ourselves or others from physical danger. Life is much more peaceful around someone who can manage their anger constructively than it is around the bull in a china shop.

Ya'll be safe out there!